MEN AS FEMINISTS
The patriarchy is the center and the origin of many social issues starting from the smallest discrimination to the biggest crimes. If someone supports this system then they also support the history of thousands of years of wars, murders, rapes and different wrong-doings.
Illustration: Argjira Kukaj
Universally, feminism is understood as a movement that believes men and women should have equal rights and opportunities, with emphasis on gender, class and race issues, which often are intertwined and can be addressed simultaneously if we want to improve people’s lives. But in the mind of a man, this concept gets misinterpreted often in a movement created to diminish men’s rights. Because we, men of the Republic of Kosovo and beyond, have gotten very used to our privileges which are based on patriarchy. At the same time, we do not even have the basic information about the issues this system brings in our everyday life.
Unwritten rules of society like: ‘become rough’, ‘become strong’, ‘use violence when needed’, ‘boys don’t cry’, ‘don’t be weak’, ‘don’t act like a girl’, become lessons in our subconsciousness. As a result, they create toxic living environments, which can lead to poor emotional health, thirst for power and even violence.
Also, the assumption that men have to be protectors, providers of food or leaders, are beliefs that create a not-so-good feeling and lay an unnecessary burden that can lead to associating men with feelings of anger, egoism, and aggression. When those beliefs are based on baseless judgements that we, as individuals and as a society strengthen, boys and men learn to believe to evaluate them, which eventually makes them destroy themselves and others.
The patriarchy is the center and the origin of many social issues starting from the smallest discrimination to the biggest crimes. If someone supports this system then they also support the history of thousands of years of wars, murders, rapes and different wrong-doings.
These unhealthy gender norms continue to shape the lives of men and boys today. Essentially, these norms secure a kind of scaffolding for a gender order that privileges men. If we still are the main beneficiaries of this gender inequality, then the destruction of these male privileges is, at least in part, a duty of men.
For men, the involvement in the feminist movement and the work against violence should be direct, regardless of barriers and challenges that may arise. All of us can attempt to address gender issues.
So, how do you become a feminist?
Even though there is not an exact answer because it depends person to person, it is quite simple. First, we need to open our mind and get educated for what it means to be a feminist. To listen and to respect the personal space of other people. To not forget that feminism is not a personal issue but a social and political movement in which we all should be involved. We can invite others to join. And most importantly to keep in our minds and to also remind others that feminism is not women against men or other genders. It has never been so and it will never be. Feminism is and should remain to be for equality for all.
To conclude our case of involvement in feminism, we can treat and solve numerous problems, because feminism is the moving force behind all social pretenses for radical protection of equality, freedom and solidarity.
About the author: Mevlon Pozhari, 17 years old from Gjakova, attends classes in High School.
This grant is supported by the Balkan Trust for Democracy, a project of the German Marshall Fund of the United States
