A DARKNESS FOR EVERYONE

Darkness is extended around me. The only light I had was from the moon, but even that didn’t get its job done. I constantly heard steps behind me. Click, click. Darkness didn’t grasp me enough. Simultaneously I didn’t know that if it would cover me or protect me or if it would contribute in my destruction. Click, click, click. I turned my head. I felt my heart at the bottom of my feet. Nothing. As it seems, I couldn’t distinguish my heartbeat from the steps of a stranger. It seemed strange when parents, full of worry, said to me “Beware of the maniac grabbing girls on the neighborhood”. I don’t know why. Maybe because up until that moment, danger for me was only an internet video. Maybe because we don’t experience something as dangerous until we at least experience a part of it, regardless of others words. We’re enclosed in a fantasy cocoon. And the worst is that this has become a norm. Murders, rapes, mistreatments have become friends of reality, and we’ve welcomed them. They’re issues which are discussed one day and then forgotten the other. We leave behind the videos, photos and texts that awaken feelings of disgust and guilt. We switch forums and channels, because it’s easier to forget the world you live in that way. We purposely live in ignorance, because the truth is very bitter when you stop and think about it. But no matter how much we turn back our heads, it’s impossible to escape something that surrounds you, something that stains routine, wellbeing and ignorance. The life we’ve built seems absolute, until the moment comes where its relativity really shines through. Maybe now it doesn’t touch us all, but if it bruises friends, neighbors, colleagues, a day will undoubtedly come when it will leave us bruised as well. We will notice this when the fruits of evil color our parents’ words and the tombstones, but then it will be too late. The moment will come when darkness will not cover us enough. The blood will freeze in our veins. The frost will move up and down our spines and the breath won’t stay in our lungs. For the moon to shine on us, and for darkness to protect us, we must tell them that we’re inviolable night riders. Because otherwise, in those key seconds, in those moments when fear boils in your stomach, the only thing you can do is hope that the steps you hear behind you, are only your heartbeat.

To awaken from our forced slumber. To open our eyes. Look around, and not just ahead. The world has much to offer, and that which it offers isn’t always beautiful. Don’t switch channels, or forums. It’s hard to see all that misery, but if we can’t face it in our screens, in reality we can’t even touch it. Fill with rage because you’re allowing, they’re allowing, and we’re allowing these things to happen. Enrage because there are people who think they can deceive in every scene, with every euro and with every fake sentence! Look, and when you look, you will notice. And then, gather your forces, and raise your voice until it covers the darkness. Speak, because darkness is silent, it doesn’t like noise. Tell people of the beasts that hide under the shadows, and tell them that, whether they like it or not, you will be those who will kill them. Place yourselves at the head of movements, the head of armies, the head of the world if it’s needed and openly say that not everything will be tolerated! And if you don’t like to talk, write, sing, paint, build or whatever gives you a push and strength! Just get your rage our, and that rage will undoubtedly inspire others. Thus you’ll know that the people you inspired, together with you leading them, are the right people to carve the road toward change.

About the author: Amina Kaja is 18-year-old who is a student in Xhevdet Doda high school in Pristina.