THE CLUB WHERE YOUNG PEOPLE ARE TRANSFORMING TOXIC NORMS OF MASCULINITY
In order for all of society to profit and for the mentality that “men are always the ones who give orders, they have the last word in families, while women are silent and do housework and raise their children” to die, there’s men in even our country who play an active role in achieving equality. They become a model for society by overcoming traditional negative behavior which make gender discrimination as one of the key problems in the country.
Illustration: Argjira Kukaj
As a democratic society, gender equality is one of the most fundamental values we strive to achieve. Rights, responsibilities, equal opportunities and non-discrimination because of gender (something that affects girls and women) are some of the goals of feminist causes for a just society. In most of feminist initiatives so far, in principle we’ve learned to work with girls and women so that we can achieve our goals for a just and equal society.
In fact, gender equality isn’t reached only with the work of girls and women. We strongly believe that gender justice and equality is achieved only when we as a society, regardless of gender, commit and work to achieve the common cause for an equal society!
In order for all of society to profit and for the mentality that “men are always the ones who give orders, they have the last word in families, while women are silent and do housework and raise their children” to die, there’s men in even our country who play an active role in achieving equality. They become a model for society by overcoming traditional negative behavior which make gender discrimination as one of the key problems in the country.
The “Be a Man Club” or “Young Men’s Initiative”, is a regional project for gender equality that is functional in Albania, Croatia, Serbia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, and it’s been implemented since 2010 in Kosovo. This project tackles the societal stereotype for men by directly working with (what we call), “the problem”- boys and men. With programs of this project we sensitize them to contribute and support gender equality.
In a research study done by the Initiative of Young Men in four countries of the Balkans: Bosnia and Herzegovina, Montenegro and Serbia, and in Kosovo, it showed that fixed gender norms of masculinity and femininity were the factor? So, their commitment in transforming gender norms is very effective and deconstructing masculine identities brings about the fact that boys can become allies and activists against violence.
The main target-groups of the project are young people of high-schools and universities. But as a result of achieving positive change in youth, programs are widened with other targets. Since the social circle a big impact on the attitudes and behaviors of young girls and boys, the club’s programs are also focused with elderly people.
Based on the program “P” – fathers, professors, health professionals and young people are on the road to become fathers, to become familiarized with the role men should have in fatherhood and active care during pregnancy, birth and raising of the children. Other target groups in the project’s programs are also representatives of institutions and social workers.
Aiming for a stronger and more inclusive influence, journalists are also a target with their potential for change. The reason we’ve started the program for journalists is because in most cases, mass media discriminates based on gender, maybe unintentionally but for higher attractions and more clicks.
Starting from the fact that in technical schools there are a lot of boys, the focus was on those who were seen as “the best allies in fighting gender stereotypes. The club has also had trainings in schools that are in deeper rural zones, where they faced many young people who didn’t know the difference between sex and gender, they didn’t even know their body and showed prejudice about the campaign, but in time the change was noticed and now most of them are gender equality promoters.
The working staff of the club is often contacted by the members’ families, who notice the difference in their sons, saying they’ve got rid of bad habits, smoking, and they’ve started cooling and cleaning. The changes that these boys and young men benefit from are very necessary for achieving an equal society, especially in a patriarchal society such as ours.
Except direct work with boys and women for promoting gender equality, the club also works with girls and young women. Elza Islami is one of the members of this club, she tells us that most of her peers were raised in a society where they thought that men are those who take decisions and that their word must be heard.
But, as she tells us, after being a member in the Club, this mentality of theirs has changed and now boys and girls together fight for the common cause through developing diverse sensitizing activities.
This club remains functional as a center for young girls and boys who aim to promote gender equality, healthy and peaceful living, mental health, reproductive and sexual health, prevention of young girls and women in radicalization and extremes of violence, so that we can achieve an equal society with a healthy collective wellbeing by transforming toxic patriarchal masculinity.
About the author: Njomza Berisha, 20 years old, is finishing her studies in political sciences at the University of Prishtina.
This activity is supported by Engagement for Equity Program – E4E, financed by United States Agency for International Development – USAID, and implemented by Advocacy Training and
Resource Center –ATRC.
